by John Lisle
The Dirty Tricks Department by John Lisle reveals the untold story of the OSS Research and Development Branch and its role in World War II. Their inventions included bat bombs, suicide pills, fighting knives, silent pistols, and camouflaged explosives. Moreover, they forged documents for undercover agents, plotted the assassination of foreign leaders, and performed truth drug experiments on unsuspecting subjects. The following is an exclusive bonus chapter from the book, covering a fascinating story involving OSS agent Peter Ortiz and his time behind enemy lines. Scroll to the bottom to listen to the audio version, recorded by narrator Pete Cross.
On January 6, 1944, Peter Ortiz parachuted into occupied France. A polyglot who spoke English, French, German, and Italian, his undercover mission was to help a cell of the French Resistance spy on and sabotage the German military. He had already been shot and captured once before during World War II, but that didn’t deter him.
The Office of Strategic Services, America’s wartime intelligence agency, had provided Ortiz with forged documents and authentic French clothing to help him blend in among the civilians and evade German detection. The disguise had one flaw, though. Ortiz had packed his United States Marine Corps uniform in his suitcase; he thought that it would give him credibility among the French Resistance. Perhaps it would, but it could just as easily get him arrested—or worse.
Shortly after Ortiz arrived in France, a German patrol guard stopped him on the street and asked him to open his suitcase for a random inspection. Ortiz was now in a bind. If he refused to cooperate, the guard would become suspicious. But if he cooperated, the guard would see his uniform. Ortiz had a split second to consider his options. With a feeling of dread, he opened the suitcase and stepped back. While the guard inspected its contents, Ortiz slipped his hand into a pocket where his fingers gripped a small suicide pill that he carried for just such an occasion. He stood still, sweating, waiting to make his move.
The guard picked up the uniform for a closer look. Ortiz had packed it inside-out so that the pins, ribbons, and Marine Corps insignia were hidden. Without much scrutiny, the guard draped it over his arm and patted it for weapons. Not finding any, he dropped it back in the suitcase and nodded to Ortiz. He was free to go.
Ortiz had passed the inspection, but his troubles as a secret agent weren’t over. His closest brush with death came soon afterward when he approached a group of German officers in a bar. His plan was to pump them full of beer, then pump them for information. If they happened to suspect him, he would pump them full of bullets.
The beer indeed loosened their lips, but it worked a little too well for Ortiz’s liking. Pretty soon, the Germans began cursing the United States. To make matters worse, one of them mocked the Marine Corps in particular. Ortiz couldn’t stand to swallow his pride any longer. He excused himself from the table with as pleasant a demeanor as he could muster, ran to his hideout, and put on his Marine Corps uniform and a raincoat.
The Germans were still cursing the “filthy American swine” when he returned to the bar. Ortiz walked straight to the counter and ordered a drink. The inebriated Germans swiveled to look at him. When he had their full attention, he shrugged off the raincoat to reveal his uniform, simultaneously pulling out a pistol and pointing it at them. “We’ve been drinking toasts to Hitler all night,” he told the sobered Germans. “Now I want to offer a different toast. To the President of the United States!” Ortiz raised a glass with his free hand. The Germans slowly raised theirs and muttered the toast. Not satisfied with their enthusiasm, he made them perform a second toast to the Marine Corps. This time the Germans roared with false pride.
Ortiz had made his point. Now it was time to escape. He backed toward the door, all the while keeping his pistol trained on the sitting Germans. When he felt the cool nighttime breeze against his backside, he ran for his life.
Listen to A Secret Agent’s Pride, narrated by Pete Cross:
John Lisle is a historian of science and the American intelligence community. He earned a Ph.D. in history from the University of Texas and has taught courses on U.S. history, cyberspace, and information warfare at the University of Texas, Louisiana Tech University, and Austin Community College. His writing has appeared in Scientific American, Smithsonian Magazine, Skeptic, The Journal of Intelligence History, and Physics in Perspective. The Dirty Tricks Department is his first book.
